Friday, February 20, 2009

We finally have our OWN house in Nebraska!!

Well, Tuesday I closed on my house in Nebraska.  It went smooth and I felt rather proud of myself for being able to buy a house on my own.  However, saying that, this milestone is also very bittersweet.  I'm very nervous about owning a house all by myself.  Granted, I'm extremely lucky to have an awesome father and brothers, but it's still nerve wracking!  I just wish Rob was living with us.  There are so many things I want to ask his opinion about and I find myself arranging the house by how I know he would have liked it.  My dad, my brothers, and I are leaving early in the morning to go to TX.  The packers and movers will be at the house there Mon-Wed and my brothers are driving my boat back for me.  Obviously, I'm anxious to have our things back and put into our new house, but I'm absolutely dreading the house in TX becoming empty.  I loved that house and Rob and I had it built together.  It would have been one thing if we were moving somewhere else the Army took us but it's so much HARDER leaving it without Rob.  That being said, I think it will help me move forward by getting settled in a new house.  I have lots of projects planned to keep me busy.  The movers are delivering our things on the 5th of March so between when we get back from TX and the 5th, my dad and I are putting hard wood floors on the main level of the house.  Plus, I also have to get Julia's room painted!  Both of those things are much easier to do BEFORE the furniture arrive!!  In my whole adult life I've never lived in a house longer than 2 years so I'm pretty sure I'm going to have to do several "projects" and rearranging in the years to come to make it feel "new" again! On a different note, Julia and I attending another Charlie Brown's group last night.  Julia usually isn't too eager to go but I still have her go because I feel in the end, it will be very beneficial to her.  Last night they started talking about the grief process and this will take several of the days to cover.  Well, when we were done, Julia said to me "Mommy, we can't miss for 2 weeks because we're talking about our feelings.  Feelings that we think are bad, like anger, really aren't bad if you learn how to use it in a good way!"  I was so happy that she was excited about this.  I can see she is listening and getting things out of it.  Plus I think it helped because last night there were several girls her age in her group.  So, little by little, minute by minute, we'll continue to figure out how to get through life without Rob and daddy.  

21 comments:

Threehourtour said...

Congratulations on closing on your new home in Nebraska Dena. I have no doubts it will be a bittersweet process as you move out of the home in texas and into your new house in Nebraska. You're doing so well and making such important decisions to help you and the girls move forward. You're really an inspiration for us all. You and the girls continue to be in my prayers each and every day.

Jodee said...

Congrats on your new house in Nebraska!

So sorry you have to leave the home you built in TX. Given the circumstances, I think a new house is definitely in order. It will be a fresh start for you and the girls. It will also be soo nice to be close to family again.

Hope your move goes smooth. Hang in there!

Anonymous said...

Hey, When you are in TX I have something for you. My mother is an artist and she made something special for you and the girls. Please let me know the best way to get it to you.

Laura Stratton
lekholmstratton@yahoo.com

Anonymous said...

You are so strong! Just remember that every step of the day and every project you accomplish means that you are doing it!

Congrats on the house. You must post pictures!

Paige Tyler said...

Well we can't wait to see you again here in Texas!! So hurry get down here. And I think you are extra brave to lay hardwood with your dad and brother! That is huge Dena-- a big step in the right direction. You are going to love them. I can't help but think that Rob is saying 'you go girl!'

See you Soon
XOXO

Anonymous said...

You are a very lucky woman to have such a loving family that will help you in any way possible. We too keep sending prayers your way to help give you strength through all of the decision making and stressful situations that may arise. We wish you safe travels from NE to TX and back. Please know that if there is anything we personally can do or our business in Osceola can do to help you, we will be there for you and your family. God Bless...

1776 said...

Your email was the first I opened this morning, and wow! I am so happy for you that things are moving along for you and the girls. Julia is one smart little girl, if only adults could be so smart.

Best of luck getting the processed completed, it won't be long now and you will be done w/the tasks. Send pics of you putting down hard wood floors! I wouldn't know where to begin.

God Bless You! Thank you for keeping us updated.

Sue Hasse said...

Dena, Bless your heart. As I try to catch up on my reading I see that you have made it with all the decisions on the house. Congratulations. I know that You will do very well in your new home and doing what is the very best for your children. You know how I know? Because I know that Rob is right there beside you guiding you in the right directions. He will always be there. You are moving on and that is exactly what he would want you do do. Be Happy.

You know that God gave you some extra time with Rob. He gave you a chance to say goodbye. Be very grateful for that. I wish every day that we could have said goodbye to Donald before he went to be with Jesus. But, that wasn't God's plan for us.

You will be in my prayers just as Nancy and Ryan are each and every day. And always remember that you are loved.

Liz said...

You should be proud :) Jeez I didn't like doing taxes by myself. I hope it becomes "home" very soon and the Texas house isn't quite as dark of a cloud. Lots of hugs and prayers.

Anonymous said...

You girls are doing such a wonderful job loving and supporting each other. We are always amazed at your inspirational words and actions and then to see Julia also, well, it just makes us smile. And Eva's smiles well they just melt anyone!Rob and you have done a beautiful job and know he is so proud of the job you continue to do! We all are! Congrats on the new home and know between your abilities and your families, wow, watch-out that already beautiful house is going to be ready for Homes and Gardens, Good Housekeeping, or any magazine cover! You are doing a wonderful job on so many levels, Dena.

God Bless you and your little ones,
The Bender Bunch

Nancy said...

Yeah, yeah, yeah!!! I am so happy you are in the house, and getting a chance to plan your furniture/paint before it all arrives. I know it will turn out fabulous, and can't wait to see it!!!! Good job keeping up with the Charlie Brown stuff too- sounds like it's growing on Julia a little bit...

xox

Anonymous said...

So happy you and the girls have your new home to start this new chapter in your life. I can't imagine how hard it is saying goodbye to your life with Rob, but I hope with each day you find more peace and happiness.

Wishing you well and all the best!! You and your girls will always be in my prayers...

Anonymous said...

Best wishes on closing on your new house. A little duct tape and some WD40 and the smiles of your two beautiful girls will go a long way to make it into a warm and loving HOME! Rob will be the sunshine coming in the windows to warm your hearts. God bless you.

Anonymous said...

{{{{{{{{{Dena}}}}}}}}}}}

One breath at a time, one prayer at a time.

ASnd yes, Rob IS with you every step of the way..I KNOW this.

Love,

Anonymous said...

Congratulations on your continued success. Big hugs from Arizona!

Long-time RN said...

Congratulations on the new house! Lots to keep you busy and certainly some bittersweet moments as well. You've been incredibly strong in moving forward, being a primary decision maker, and so fortunate to have family support. Hang tough in Texas, we know it won't be easy. Blessings.

Anonymous said...

Dena,
Congratulations! The house sounds so great and such a huge step for you. I am around your age, new mom, and loving life. However, I could never imagine purchasing my own home and doing renovations on my own. You are one STRONG woman -but I already knew that. I pray that the move goes smoothly. Give your dad and bros a big hug for me. It is so great to have the support of family during these times. I am sure you and the girls will have a blast making this home YOURS! All the best!

Heather in Helena, MT

Jamie Clark said...

Dear Dena,
My name is Jamie Clark, and I am the proud widow of CW3 Donald Clark. Don was killed in a helicopter crash in Mosul, Iraq on November 15,2008.
I just finished tearfully reading your story and wanted to express my sympathy and gratitude.
Everyone has said what a common bond, as military widows, we have. Reading your blog was like reading my own story. It is nice to know there is someone in this world who can truly say "I know".
Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers as are all the many families that have lost a loved one like us. If you would like to connect my e-mail is painted_chance@me.com.
God Bless

Anonymous said...

Dena, I haven't seen or talked to you in awhile and hope you're getting along. . . .as good as you can be, anyway. Please, please, please, let me know if there is anything I can help out with. Your house, your girls, making a cocktail???? I'm so happy to know you have your house! Take care and PS., that picture of Rob is Awesome!
Kasey

Anonymous said...

Hi Dena, My name is Aerica Hall. My husband, Cpt Jason Hall, is currently serving in Afghanistan. He is the Squadran Intelligence Officer with 6/4 Cav. I wanted to tell you how very sorry we are for your loss. I know this must be a difficult time for you but wanted to share something that my daughter and her freind have been working very hard on.
My daughter Kenzie and her friend Alex have started a nonprofit organization for military kids. It is called the Brat Pack 11 foundation.
This foundation is designed to help children of military families that currently have a deployed parent or whose parent was killed during a deployment. Each wish that is granted is intended to assist the child in pursuing their dreams thus benefitting the family and the community at large in which they live.

When Jason left for Afghanistan I had given my girls a choice. A choice to stay where we were, move back to Arizona or live out their wildest dreams. The girls chose to live out their wildest dreams. She met a very good friend, Alex Davis, who was going through a similar situation with her father being away. Both girls had a dream to help create opportunities for these children. They got together and formed the brat pack.

Jason had called and spoke with the girls about your husband. They wanted your girls to be the first recepients of the "brat pack"

We would to love to be able to do something in honor of your husband and grant a dream for your girls. We would love for your girls to make a list of dreams and forward them to us. Our website is currently being built but you can contact me directly at aericahall@yahoo.com and I can then give you my phone number.

Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Gods Blessings,
Aerica Hall

Anonymous said...

How's the move going? Can you post some photo's? Warm wishes from Arizona,