Tuesday, March 24, 2009
I know a lot of you are anxious to see some photos of the place. I haven't forgotten about you but my camera has seemed to have grown legs and walked off. As soon as I locate it and have some time to take pics, I'll share a few!! :) We're getting settled little by little. The realities of life continue to slowly sink in. I miss Rob so much. You don't realize how much you take someone for granted until they're gone. Rob was such an amazing father and husband. He helped with the house and kids so much. It's very overwhelming doing the every day things on your own. When Rob was deployed all those times, I was able to do them because I knew there was a light at the end of the tunnel. I was also able to ask him questions and get his advice. Now, I feel like I'm blindly walking through life praying I do the right things. As strange as this may seem, I can hear Rob talk to me. Whether it's me saying the things that Rob would say to me, or him actually saying them to me, I still find comfort in it. There have been several times when I didn't know where something was at or how to do something when I would "hear" him and then I would find the thing or figure out how to do it. It's super crazy but I feel we are that connected. I cling to our memories and cherish the time we spent. I point out daddy to Eva in pictures and she says "dada". She will grow up knowing what an amazing daddy she and Julia had. Julia's doing great. We have our moments where she likes to "test" me, but for the most part, she's a great help and most definetly a wonderful big sister. It's hard not being part of the military anymore. When you move to new places, the military "forced" you to meet new people through coffees and other gatherings. Being new here, it's hard for me to get out and meet people. In honesty, I'm too exhausted to even think about meeting people. I'm still consumed in paperwork and being the "all in one" parent takes a lot out of you. But, in time, things will get better. I'm blessed to have the support I do and could not ask for better friends and family.
Posted by Dena Yllescas at 11:28 PM